2014 caught me
This has been an experience. A year ago I was barely aware that I was capable of accomplishing things. My accomplishments just happened to me. So did my failures.
So did a lot of stuff.
A year is a very long list of things that happened, and I don’t want to write the whole thing down. For the sake of future-Hannah, who will probably read through 2013 a few times:
You fell in love. A lot.
With your life and and your music and your friends and Jacob. Sometimes you were so taken with how your life was going that you forgot to put in any work, or give your life the attention it needed. Hopefully you’re reading this sometime when you’re not still feeling the negative effects of that.
Other than that, you’re on a good track.
2014 looks big and important to me. If 2013 could happen like it did while I was less active, 2014 is going to be a lot better.
I think mostly in old cliches. My formal writing is usually cheesy as hell. I read some of the things I write and they strike me as slightly displaced imitations of film-dialogue. Not all of it is terrible, though. I’m proud.
We’re reaching the end of whatever this blog is supposed to be. I think I’ll keep it. It’s been a great place to think things out and choose my words like I want to. It made me into more of a thinker. I think. I guess.
Yesterday I walked into my room to finally go to sleep and the realization hit me so abruptly: I’ve grown out of it. I’m carrying so much stuff in here. So many old, old things that aren’t relevant or helping me in life. All they do is end up on my floor and in my space and then I can’t work anymore. What I need now is time and space to work, and I don’t know what happened, but I feel tall and strong. I don’t need to hide in the corner of this house, and I won’t be here forever. I don’t know how much longer I’ll be here at all.
That’s the most exciting part of 2014. I can get up and live it.
So that “We should have our own show - said every group of friends ever” post has been going around, and I think about it a lot because, like, isn’t that kind of what we’re doing sometimes?
I love showing off my friends. I’m pretty sure my followers kind of know who my friends are. So not only do I have my own presence on the internet, but my relationships with people have their own presence on the internet, and a lot of those relationships take place in a public space. It’s totally fine, but anyone could follow along and be as entertained as we are. This is kind of like our own show, right?
I don’t know. I see a lot of conversations on tumblr and twitter between people I don’t really know, but I laugh with them. I’m a fan.
Here’s a full rough-draft of a song I wrote called “Big Damn Heroes” and it’s about Firefly and yes
This song is unfinished and untitled and I’m looking for some constructive criticism
Guys I can’t believe we made it to world cup. Strangers kept coming up to us and congratulating us, and I think it’s because they’re just as impressed (and surprised) as I am that a team who’s been working together for less than 2 months fought their way through regionals to the world cup. I forget how inexperienced we actually are, so what we’ve done is absolutely brilliant.
I’ve never lacked confidence in our team. In fact I get more frustrated than I’ve ever been when we don’t do well because all I want is for people to know we’re as good as I know we are. But it just would have made sense if we didn’t make it to world cup. If we didn’t make it, we really would have been put in our place as the youngest team with the least experience who couldn’t make it with the big kids.
We made it, though. We actually qualified for world cup. For realsies. That’s a huge statement for our team, and we can totally live up to that expectation.
I Keep Spelling “Nermon,” So I Give Up - icanSOdorandom
This is for Kirstyn